Staying Connected With Grandchildren Near and Far
Whether your grandchildren live next door or across the country, there are creative ways to build close relationships through visits, calls, letters and shared activities.
The short version
- Regular, predictable contact helps build strong relationships.
- Shared activities, like reading together over video, make calls more engaging.
- Respect parents' rules and routines to keep family relationships smooth.
In this guide
Grandparents can play a special role in a child's life as storytellers, teachers, cheerleaders and trusted adults. Today, many families are spread across cities, states or even countries. Distance can make relationships harder, but with a little creativity, it is possible to stay close.
Make contact predictable
Children thrive on routine. A regular call or video chat, such as every Sunday afternoon, gives them something to look forward to. Short, frequent calls often work better than long, occasional ones, especially for young children.
Make video calls interactive
Young children may lose interest in a conversation quickly. Try activities instead:
- Read a story together, holding the book up to the camera.
- Play simple games like I Spy, 20 Questions or rock-paper-scissors.
- Show and tell: take turns sharing a favorite toy, drawing or something from the garden.
- Cook or bake together, each in your own kitchen with the same recipe.
- Do a craft with the same supplies on both ends.
- Sing songs or have a dance party.
Older children and teens may enjoy talking about their interests, playing an online game together or watching the same movie and discussing it.
Old-fashioned mail still delights
Children love receiving mail with their name on it. Ideas include:
- Postcards from places you visit
- Letters with a puzzle, joke or drawing included
- Small care packages for birthdays or the start of the school year
- Newspaper clippings about their favorite team or hobby
- Pen-pal letters where you write back and forth
Share your story
Grandchildren often love hearing about your childhood and family history. You might:
- Record yourself telling stories about growing up.
- Create a scrapbook with old photos and captions.
- Share family recipes and the stories behind them.
- Write a letter about an important moment in your life.
Your local library or historical society may have tips on recording family stories, and some offer equipment you can borrow.
Make the most of visits
- Plan some special activities, but also leave time for ordinary moments together.
- Let grandchildren help with simple tasks like cooking or gardening.
- Start traditions, like a special breakfast or an annual outing.
- Take photos together and send them afterward.
Stay current with their interests
Ask about their friends, school, hobbies and favorite shows or books. Read the books they are reading or learn about their favorite sport. Showing genuine interest builds connection.
Work with parents
Parents set the rules for their children. Check with them about screen time, gifts, food and bedtime. Supporting their parenting choices helps keep family relationships smooth and builds trust.
Technology tips
- Ask a family member or library staff to help set up video calling.
- Keep your device charged and close to your favorite chair.
- Use a stand so you do not have to hold the device during calls.
- Be patient with yourself while learning new apps.
Grandparents raising grandchildren
If you are raising grandchildren, support is available. Your local Area Agency on Aging and family caregiver support programs can help connect you with resources, support groups and information about benefits.
